The New Year’s celebration is one of my favorites.  Though my own celebration of New Year’s eve is minimal, I am very fond of this holiday which starts loudly in one year and winds down quietly in the next. It isn’t a religious or memorial holiday, yet it has a thoughtful profundity and an illogical optimism.  Like Fat Tuesday, it is a day when we absurdly indulge in things we hope to give up.   It is a  mile-post on life’s  journey, a point at which to assess how far we’ve come and speculate about what lies ahead.

Then first newspaper of the New Year is my favorite.  It usually features the best and worst of the previous year– including reminders of all the famous people who died.  It often features predictions for the coming year and an abundance of ads for stuff to help us keep our resolutions, like work-out equipment and organizers.  Perhaps there are folks who wake up the morning after drinking too much champagne, raring to buy a treadmill, the latest pair of New Balance, storage bins or shelf units, but I suspect most are more like me, who wake up thinking about stuff like mimosas and Eggs Benedict.

Regrettably, most of us meander through life with little thought of how our time is passing, but like birthdays, anniversaries, illnesses and deaths, each New Year provides another measure of how quickly our lives pass.  It is a  valuable reminder not to squander what will be gone too quickly, whether it be our vitality or our time with those around us.

We need those benchmarks.  There was a public figure the same age as I, whenever that person accomplished something newsworthy, it reminded me of how much a single individual can accomplish, but more importantly it reminded me of how little I had accomplished.  That person died a few years ago, and now serves only to remind me  how suddenly life can end.

However, like those times when it isn’t feasible to remodel so we settle for new paint or new curtains, sometimes overhauling our entire life isn’t practical.  Though there are many things I’d like to completely redo in my life, I content myself with making small changes I can manage, like setting the tone for the one to come.

Started the year with a new manicure and pedicure.  Nothing unusual about that, except since I tend to choose the same polish, month after month, I let my mani-pedi girl pick for me.   I would have never have chosen what she chose for me, as a result, I left her shop feeling like I was wearing someone elses’ fashion.  Two colors of glitter polish, may not sound that radical, but to me it was symbolic of being open to the whims and advice of others–especially those with more experience.

Though I am a naturally lucky person, I rarely gamble.  It seems gambling is a pastime which makes more losers than winners.  Nevertheless, I bought a lottery ticket.  Had it been a winning ticket, I could have told myself it was a fortuitous omen for the coming year, but since it served only to make my pocket lighter, I discarded it along with the many other disappointments of 2011.

I bought myself a new coffee maker, a sort of Christmas gift to myself, but in keeping with the “out with the old and in with the new” thing, I waited until Jan, to try it. Trying to figure out how to disassemble and reassemble it, the first time, could almost fill another blog post, but this first challenge of The New Year, was a good reminder of how important it is to be open to change and ready to learn new ways of doing familiar things.

As I drank my coffee, I reflected on the past year, a Christmas season in which I gave myself a vacation from the expectations of others and allowed myself to do things to restore my sense of self.  I replayed events in a year, including many dealings with tradesmen and tenants.  Reflecting on those experiences inspired me to make a single resolution.

Having been often taken advantage of by those to whom I was too nice, I resolved to be meaner.  Not more assertive, not more aggressive, just less nice.  I don’t like mean people and certainly don’t want to become one, but  people take advantage of nice people.  I can’t help being kind, it’s in my nature, but after having too many experiences in which I felt I shouldn’t have been so nice, I decided to try harder to be mean.  Chances are I’ll fail, but I’m guessing I won’t be the only one who doesn’t keep their resolutions.